Dear Le Top: My husband is over-protective. What should I do?

“This is my first pregnancy. In my first trimester, I really had an awful bout of morning sickness. Now I’m 17 weeks and things are starting to feel back to normal, and my appetite has returned. The problem is, my husband is worried that I am not gaining any weight. In fact, I am the same weight as before I got pregnant. He goes to all my doctor’s appointments, he reads more pregnancy books than I do, and makes sure that all the food that I eat is healthful. I appreciate all the attention but it’s driving me crazy? What should I do?”
— Patricia (Irvine, CA)

The joys of the first pregnancy: such a special time, yet enough to drive you bananas because there is so much information to know and learn. AND, everyone seems to have an opinion about what’s best for you. It is wonderful to have such a caring and attentive husband. Not everyone shares those circumstances. He wants to be part of the pregnancy as much as possible. On the other hand, I can see how his behavior could make you go crazy. He is smothering you and not trusting your own judgement. You’re new to this as much as he is, and his actions can cause undue stress. The best advice I could give is to make sure you are both keeping the lines of communication open. Talk to him and tell him how you are feeling. If he is as caring as you say, he should be able to understand that you need some space. And if he is reading more pregnancy books than you, then he should know that women experience pregnancy in different ways. And, the same woman can experience each pregnancy differently. If he still isn’t giving you enough space, I would suggest that you talk, together, with your obstetrician to address his concerns and consider asking for a third opinion. Good luck with your pregnancy!

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Dear le•top: My Husband Really Wants a Baby Boy?

“My husband and I have three darling daughters. He desperately wants to have a son to pass on the family name. Can you give us some tips on making a baby boy?”
— Carol, Forest Hill, MD

I have four brothers, therefore my parents were quite successful in making baby boys. But there is no way I’m going to ask my parents about… Shhh! Whisper it… SEX. (I’d rather ask a priest or a nun.)

Here’s what I’ve found doing my own unscientific “research”:

• We’ve learned that male sperm swim faster, so try for conception the day the woman ovulates so that there is an egg present when the male sperm reaches it.
• A woman who eats more meat and salty snacks can increase the chances of producing a baby boy.
• Dads-to-be need to drink up on soda.
• Women should sleep to the left of their partners.

Share your thought with us. We would love to hear from you.

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Dear Le Top: How do I Make a Baby Girl?

“I have two boys whom I love dearly. My husband and I want to get pregnant again but want to try for a girl this time. Any secrets on how to make a baby girl?”
— Michelle, Renton, WA

Is there a secret to making a baby girl (or boy)? My friends and I have had many discussions about this topic…whether it’s dependent on the time of the month the woman is ovulating, or the time of year the couple conceives…I wonder if there is a science to this? So, I did some “research”, and here are some interesting theories on making a baby girl:

• The older the man, the more likely it will be a girl.
• If the man has recently been on a flight, the chances of having a girl is higher.
• Male sperm swim faster but female sperm live longer. If you try for conception earlier in the woman’s ovulation cycle (when the egg isn’t present yet), chances are the female sperm will be around when the egg finally does come out. The male sperm will get there faster but will die off before the egg appears.
• A woman who eats more dairy, fish, vegetables and chocolate can increase the chances of producing a baby girl.
• Moms-to-be should initiate sex.

Do you have your own theories? Family lore? Old wives’ tales? We would love to hear from you!
(Stay tuned tomorrow for tips on how to make a baby boy.)

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