Okay – it is true confessions time! I am at a loss, and hate to admit that my almost 3 year old daughter seems to have managed to best me on potty training. I was impressed that Jamee seemed to have had a pretty easy time – but it certainly has not worked that way for me. Lilah is very capable of going without diapers – and has proved this during weekend shopping outings. She seemed to easily manage – communicating when it was time to visit the restroom.
Lilah wearing her pull-up as a hat
At age 18 months I ‘introduced’ Lilah to the concept – and purchased a small seat that sits on the toilet, with a stool used for accessibility. I had heard that it was important not to push too early, so we waited until she was 27 months before we started really trying to ‘train’ – not wanting to make her feel uncomfortable and losing her cooperation in the process.
When Lilah is at home she does not wear a diaper, and uses the potty when needed. She follows all the ‘rules’ – and always remembers to wipe and flush. We praise her for her actions, hoping this will be the positive reinforcement needed. When she is at daycare she ALWAYS chooses to wear diapers! Perhaps she does not want to be bothered with interrupting her play? I give her a choice of wearing her new Dora and Sesame Street underwear or putting on a diaper – and the choice is consistently to wear her Elmo diapers. Is it a problem that I am giving her a choice?
Lilah’s daycare has other children her age, and they all seem to be wearing diapers. The children are regularly taken to the potty – and receive stickers and praise when they successfully use the potty. Perhaps when one switches the others will fall in line? Of course I would love for Lilah to be a leader in this arena! She will be moving to preschool late next year and will be required to be potty trained by that time. I really want this to happen sooner than later – since it is obvious she is capable, but chooses not to ‘participate’ fully. The le•top staff has contributed suggestions – including ‘you’re getting to be a big girl’ and the pretty panties angle. Nothing has worked so far. Is there a ‘magic word’ I should know? Let’s share!
No magic word. No special finger snap. No hidden handshake. It falls into place when it falls into place. YOU are doing everything right. Now it is up to her. And she clearly demonstrates that she has all the pieces of the puzzle…and puts it together when she chooses. And, this dear mama, is what it all comes down to. “When she chooses”. It’s a huge issue ripe with power struggles and control issues. Your DD has “control” when she wants to. From here on out, it is a waiting game…patience…patience…patience. And the less she thinks it to be an issue for you, the better.
One of my faves (but kids are way beyond this now…and moving towards driving a REAL car…YIPES!)…is
“It’s Potty Time”….available on Amazon.com.
Good luck! Did I mention the patience part? LOL
Thanks for the encouragement. I’ve found lately that patience is the most important thing I can have in regards to most of what she’s doing right now. I also have to teach her to have more of it. I haven’t tried It’s Potty Time. Maybe she’ll get that for Xmas.
Two words: LIP GLOSS
Haha! At least that’s what worked with Miranda. I consider myself LUCKY when I potty trained her. Who knows what challenges Paulo will give me. I have a feeling lip gloss as a reward may now work on him.
Good luck, TC!!! It’ll happen soon. She obviously can do it. I think she just wants to be in control.
I will have to try that. She does love lip gloss and CONTROL seems to be her middle name these days.
TC – Now that I’ve met you face-to-face… WHOA! Lilah is a spitting image of you. Those eyes!
BTW-Over the holidays we told Lilah no diapers during the day. It wasn’t that big of a deal since my husband and I both took over a week off. I’m proud to say that she was great even when we were traveling. Since returning to daycare she has had no accidents.